"Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh." Genesis 2:24
Today is a very special day for my family. Today, my daughter Amanda will be getting married to her fiance, Nathan. Our families are extremely excited for them both as they start a new family. For me, a flood of memories and emotions fill my heart. As a pastor and a dad, it will be a honor and a privilege uniting two lives into "one union."
God has a plan for the marriage relationship. God created the institution of marriage. The purpose God has in bringing a man and a woman together in marriage can be captured in two very important words: Leave and cleave.
First, a successful marriage begins with leaving. The closest relationship outside of marriage is specified in Genesis 2:24, which implies that it is necessary to leave your father and mother. Once you get married, it doesn't mean that you are no longer a son, or a daughter, or a sibling. But, it does signify that you have a new core value and a primary responsibility and that is to your spouse. Honoring your mother and father is still evident, but leaving has taken place.
In addition, all other relationships and lesser ties to people must be altered, broken, or left behind. Leaving implies giving other relationships a lesser degree of importance. Friends are still important, but your best friend should be your spouse. I encourage you to be a "student" of your spouse and continue incorporating the courtship aspect into your marriage.
Secondly, the word "cleave" means to glue or to cling, adhering to or sticking together. It is a bond that is not intended to be broken. So the two (husband and wife) cannot be separated without serious damage. The verb suggests a determined action. So it is not that a husband and wife are stuck together, but rather they are sticking together. They are clinging to one another and there is nothing passive about it. It requires an unwavering commitment and fierce determination.
God's formula for marriage is really unique. It's when one plus one plus one equals one. The heart of a oneness marriage is an intense spiritual relationship between one man and one woman and the one true God, Jesus Christ.
Is your spouse still your best friend?
Are you still a "student" of your spouse?
Leaving and cleaving are key components to a successful marriage.
Posted on Fri, October 7, 2011
by Keith Knight